


Rising Sun

by Haru_Loysingh



Category: DBSK|Tohoshinki|TVXQ
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst, M/M, Postapocalyptic, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-11
Updated: 2013-08-11
Packaged: 2017-12-23 03:51:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/921665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haru_Loysingh/pseuds/Haru_Loysingh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in a future world Junsu, Jae and Yoochun live in mostly abbandoned Seoul. During one of their hunts they find a man on his desperate search for his brother and Junsu feels strangely addicted to him from the first sight.</p><p> </p><p>Written 2008</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Yunho´s PoV**   
  
Imagine a world gone chaos. Humandkind depended too much on technology and then when a sunstorm hit the earth they thought it was nothing. That they could survive it with the help of their technology. But they were wrong. It was the technology that went down first. But humans didn´t give up. They tried again. Tried to depend on technology again. But they were wrong.   
Wars broke out over the remaining recources. They shot nuclear weapons at each other, burning out what was left of the earth.   
Still the remaining humans tried again. And again. And then The Cloud came. It darkened the sky and we never saw the sun again. The sky isn´t blue anymore. It´s in a violet, purple color. The sun is still there but it´s not visible through the purple clouds anymore. We don´t know what it was, but it changed everything.   
I´m one of the survivors - one of the few who´s still sane. Who´s still "normal".   
  
It took me several months to find out where they brought my little brother for the so called "Sci-kid programm". He´s smart - which is his problem. Some humans still believe in technology. They think that if they bring computers and humans together the earth can start again.   
Smarter.   
Better.   
So they stole children. Streetkids like us are their prey. Smart streetkids.   
Changmin was just a child when they took him away from me.   
Ever since then I´m searching for him.  
  
Cold fear creeps up my spine as I reach the laboratory.   
I´m too late.   
The building´s half gone, crashed down by the last earthquake just some hours ago. Some parts are still burning and I see some streetrats, youngsters like me, running out, arms full with everything they can carry. One one them sees me before I´m able to hide. He calls out to his friends and point over at me.   
I know I should run but my wish to search the laboratory before it goes down completly. I wanna make sure Changmin´s not in there anymore... but then my eyes meet with the ones of one of the streetrats. I feel like something just hit me. He´s just about my age, maybe even younger and his hair is almost completely white, just in his ponytail are some black strains. He´s the most beautiful creature I´ve ever seen. His eyes look back at me, so dark and sad, his small nose and his lips are so full I feel a craving to kiss them.   
He comes over to me, takes my arm and we hurry into the shadows. "Nothing left in there", he says and his voice rings in my ears. That must have been how the birds - long gone - have sounded like. " _They_ have been here already and they might come back soon. They didn´t leave much behind. At least nothing´s still alive in there."   
Finally I snap out of my trance. "Are there any kids left in there?" I ask, my heart beating way too fast. He can´t be dead!   
The beautiful boy in front of me looks over his shoulder. "Jae, any kids left?"   
"Just dead ones", comes the reply. "Junsu, we should hurry. _They_ could be back any minute for the bodies."   
Junsu´s his name. Again I stare into his eyes for a second before I get up and run into the building. I hear the others call and I feel at least one of them follow me.   
Junsu grabs my arm just as I pass the maindoor. "I said there´s nothing left! Don´t risk your life for nothing, blackhair!"   
"My brother´s in here!" I turn to face him, pain in my eyes. "I...have to make sure.."   
He looks back to the other two and nods. "Okay", he says more to himself than to one of us. "Yoochun, the way to the labs, quick!"   
The one of with the long brown hair groans, while the other one nods and points dwn the hall. "Follow me!"   
  
  
**Jaejoong´s PoV**  
  
This is just suicidal! It´s insane! _They_ can be back any minute and yet we´re going back in just because this strange guy wants to check on a dead body! He could be one of _them_ \- hiding. Pretending. But Junsu trusts him and I know my lover does as well.   
I sigh and pull out my gun. I will protect those I love.   
Yoochun turns and looks at me. I send him a quick smile and he hurries on. I´m the last in the row, making sure noone follows us.   
I love him.   
Yoochun.  
We was half dead when Junsu and I found him. Accidently. We were hiding for some of _them_ when we found shelter in an abanddoned - or so we thought - house. But it wasn´t empty. Well, not really. He was the only one surviving. _They_ had murdered his whole family, sparing him just because he wasn´t at home. He was starving and dehydrated but when our eyes met I saw a glimpse of the will to survive.   
  
"There are some bodies in these rooms, but we checked on most of them. They´re dead!" I hear my lover say and we both wait outside while Junsu and the blackhaired guy check the rooms.   
  
  
**Junsu´s PoV**  
  
Jaejoong and Yoochun are all but happy that I help him but... I don´t know the reason myself. I just felt drawn to him the moment I saw him outside. I still do. As soon as he looks at me with those two dark orbs. They faszinate me. They go straight into my heart and soul. Jae once told me when he met Yoochun he just knew they were destined for eath other. Maybe I start to understand what he meant.   
In a world where humankind is minimized like this - maybe they´re just the way fate goes.   
Maybe that´s just what was once called "Love on the first sight."   
  
I can´t keep my eyes off him while I follow him through the laboratory. My gaze wander over his slim size, his body and wide shoulders. I want him. Want to make him mine. I want to pin him down on the matrace in my room and make love to him. Capture that mouth of him. Enter him. Feel him all over.  
But there are other priorities now. We need to find his brother.   
He enters the last room in front of me and I hear him call out a name.   
Changmin.   
Is that the name of his brother? It makes me realize I don´t even know his name yet.   
When I enter the room I see him lift a body from the floor. The boy´s naked, besides some bandages around his arm and head. He´s not moving and really pale. My blackhaired fantasy pulls him close, checking him for lifesigns.   
When he finally lifts his head I see tears glistening in his eyes.   
"Please, he´s still alive. Barely but alive. Please help me with him!"   
I rush over to his side, taking one of the blankets from the beds to wrap the boy - hell, he´s taller than me! - into it. Blackhair takes him onto his arms as if he weights nothing - well, he was really skinny. I can´t help but mentally drool at the muscles I see bulge under the tight shirt.   
I want him.  
Under me.  
Moaning my name.   
But it has to wait. As little as my crotch and mind likes that thought.  
As soon as we leave the room I see Jaejoong running over to me. "It´s too late for the front door! _They_ ´re here!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Jaejoong´s PoV**  
  
Imagine humangkind gone crazy. When he earth started to go chaos they had nothing better to do than shoot at each other with nuclear weapons, blaming each other for the catastrophies.   
They didn´t realize what happened around them. They were deaf and blind for what happend. They didn´t see the nature prepairing for a revenge. And so it was too late when it happened.   
Today noone can tell anymore how it started but with the sun disappearing _it_ gained more and more power. Now, that the sky is hidden under purple clouds the sun is not visible anymore. And nature started it revenge on humankind.   
We have given it a name. It´s pure sarcasm left in the humans - calling the revenge by the only thing that could probably destroy it.   
They called it "Rising Sun."   
It probably started with a seed. Mutated by the nuclear bombs, by whatever. We don´t know. We will probably never now. Maybe it´s even alien. Who can say?  
It found it´s way into a human body, feeding from it, planting itself in it´s guts.   
Humans with the seed are the worst enemies of their own kind now. Their haitred for their own kind who are actually guilty for what happens to them has taken over their minds. They have nothing to loose. As soon as the seeds will bloom inside them, they are about to die.   
Seedhosts are nowadays mostly called _Them_ because humans just didn´t find a name for them yet. _They_ fear nothing and they destroy everything in order to survive a little longer. To find an antidote against the seeds. But with all the long gone knowledge and with all the technology left they didn´t find it yet.   
  
Blackhair hugs the unconsious body of his brother to his chest as I tell Junsu that _they_ ´re here. "We can´t fight them here!" he says. I laugh at him and show him my gun. "No but we can snap their lights out. Sure we can fight them!" I turn to Junsu. "And we have to - at least long enough so you and blackhair can escape!"   
Blackhair stares at the weapon. It´s not really a gun. More like a taser. It lames them for a while. I just can´t bring myself to kill one of them. They´re still humans somewhere.   
I laugh at blackhair. "Yoochun can build just about everything.  
"No time for that" Yoochun shows up behind me and takes my arm. He turn and rushes back down the hall.  
I turn my eyes to Junsu. "Su, you, blackhair and babybrother there should try to find the backexit. We´ll give you enough time. We´ll meet at the car in half an hour!"   
"My name´s Yunho!" he hear blackhair growl but I see he´s thankful for our help.   
"I don´t care blackhair!" I hiss at him. "Now get the fuck outta here!" I place my second taser in Junsu´s hand before I run down the corridor, following my lover´s footsteps.   
  
  
**Yunho´s PoV**  
  
We don´t make it far. Two of the seedhosts block our way. They must have come through the backdoor, maybe checking for intruders like us. Sometimes it´s hard to tell them and normal humans apart but you can see the determination in their eyes and their behavior.   
At least they´re alone.   
I know I can handle two of them.   
But still...  
I put Changmin down, carefully placing him against the wall while the seedhosts glare at us, trying to find our weak spot to attack there first. And they don´t need to search long.   
"Give us the kid!" one of _them_ hiss at us They really still believe technology can help them. "They changed him! His autopsy can help us to find..."   
My fist lands on his nose before he can finish. The guy stumbles back, blood running down from his broken nose. I land another kick on his chest, pressing the air out of his lungs and making him stumble back against the wall. Junsu knocks him out with the taser while I turn over to the next one. He´s tougher than the first one but I had lots of training while living on the streets.   
Junsu stares at me while I bind the hands and feed of the seedhosts with some fishing robe, which I always keep in my pocket It´s light but can´t be ripped easily.   
Sounds of a fight reach us and we hear Jae call out the name of his lover. I turn to Junsu, handing him one of the tiny knifes I hide in my boots. "Take care of my brother. I´ll go help them!"   
Junsu nods but just as I make my first step he suddenly wraps his fingers around my arm, pulls me back and against the wall. Before I can just gasp I feel his lips on mine. After the first split seconds of surprise I kiss him back.  
Deep.  
Sensual.   
"Come back to me", he whispers and I feel it´s more an order than a plea.  
"I will", I promise him before I run down the corridor.  
  
  
 **Yoochun´s PoV**  
  
Pain runs through my arm as we make our way out of the building. Luck was on our side as parts of the ceiling broke down, crushing most of our enemies under it. Jaejoong helps me walk cursing at Yunho silently for bringing us in a situation like this. He´s mad that I´m wounded, I know, but I also know he´s not really mad.   
Yunho did it for his brother and I can undestand him. I would have done the same - if my brother were still alive.   
Junsu waits in the car. Changmin´s lying on the backseat and I tell Yunho to take a place there. I see Junsu´s eyes narrow in worry as he sees Yunho and I both are wounded. But they´re just minor wounds. Nothing that won´t be gone in a few hours or days.   
Yunho takes the place on the backseat, placing his brother´s head on his lap. He gently strokes the darkbrown hair of the boy. Changmin can´t be younger than one or two years actually.   
The drive back to our shag outside of downtown Seoul is quiet. Just Jae´s mumbling and his worry for me disturb the silence.   
  
While Junsu helps Yunho to bring Changmin into one of the empty rooms, I follow Jaejoong into the kitchen.   
"Show me your arm!" Jae orders me and I take off my shirt, letting him take a look on the slash I got by one of the seedhosts. I bite my lip as he washes dirt from the wound and wraps a bandage around it. "Maybe it won´t even leave a scar", he whispers.   
I nod and smile at him. "You don´t want me scarred?"   
Jae smiled faintly and sits down on my lap. "I don´t want you dead!" he whispers, stealing a kiss from my lips. Right that moment we hear feet shuffling above us, something falls on the floor in the room above us and I hear Junsu cry out. Jaejoong gets up alarmed.   
Chuckling I pull Jae back onto my lap. "Don´t. He needs him. Just as I need you." I kiss him again but my lover doesn´t give up yet.   
"But he´s a total stranger! We can´t afford to feed him and his brother! We barely have enough for ourselves!" I look at him and as usual my look makes him calm down. "Wasn´t I a stranger to you and Junsu when you found me? Ready to die? And yet you took me in, promising me a better life. He needs him", I repeat. "Just as I need you."   
  
**Junsu´s PoV**  
  
We bring Changmin into one of the empty rooms on the first floor. The House is huge but was abanddoned long ago. We managed to get hot water and a generator in the basement gives us enough electricity for the lamps.   
Yunho covers his brother with the blankets and tries to check on his condition by removing the bandages. I feel helpless but I think he´s just the same. There isn´t much we can do. We´re not doctors and we have no idea what they did to him. We can just see the surface. We have no idea what´s underneath.  
I lean against the door watching Yunho trying to actually do something but he´s more or less just helplessly holding his hand.   
I can´t stand to watch it for long. After some moments I walk over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.   
“Come with me”, I say gently but he realizes I won´t allow a refusal.   
He needs distraction.   
We both need it.   
I guide him to my room and close the door.  
A smile runs over my face. He stands there, looking like a little lost kitten to me.   
I reach out my arms and he hugs me, tight. He almost clings to me but I free myself planting a kiss on his lips. Gently first but with the second and third one I become more rough, demanding.   
I want him.  
And now there´s nothing in our way.   
We undress each other in a record time, just interrupted by hasty kisses. We both can´t wait to feel each others skin, to touch each other – to become one.   
We don´t even make it to the bed. I take him on the floor, hard. Rough. Making him scream my name in pleasure.   
Later on the bed we take our time. Exploring the body of the other more gently, soothingly.   
  
“Why is it white?” he asks me as we lay huddled together in the afterglow of sex. Our bodies sweaty, limbs tangled. He ignores the pain that stings from the wound he got in the fight earlier while I can just stare at him, disbelieving I found in him what Jae found in Chun.   
“Hmm?” Is all I give back.  
“Your hair, why is it white?” he asks again.   
He doesn’t get an answer. Yoochun enters without knocking, his gaze sliding over our naked bodies and he grins before he says: “He´s awake.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Changmin´s PoV**  
  
Imagine some scientists gone mad. Their whole work seemed to be destroyed in a few hours when the sunstorm hit the earth. Then the war. Then The Cloud. But they didn´t give up. They thought that there´s a way for humankind to survive everything. As long as they´re smarter then the usual. As long as they´re better.  
But how to make humankind better?  
It took them dozens of years and lots of innocent lives to find that out. But then they found their answers.   
No. Singular. There´s only one answer - yet.  
It´s me.  
Or I should rather say I´m the prototype of their answer.   
I am a Sci-Kid. I´m immune to the seeds. And there are microchips in my head. I can link myself to every still available computer. I can get data without wanting it! At least that´s how they explained it to me. I´m the first to survive the programm. To survive the operations. So they probably don´t know the answer themselves.   
I don´t know if I can call myself lucky to have survive it.  
But well, maybe now I can be normal again. Not in sterile rooms. Not in constant pain.   
  
When I open my eyes the first time I think I am finally dead - with an angel hovering over me. But what makes me think - the angel is clad in black. Well, angels don´t wear black, right? And then he pokes my cheek, making me more or less sure I am at least not dead. I am still not sure about the angel though.  
My head spins when I open my eyes a second time and try to look around. This is definetely not the laboratory. Another man enters joining the longhaired angel and then leaves again. Just moments later he comes back and brings two more people - hell I haven´t seen so much people without a white coat in months!. The two new ones are only half clothed though and look as if they were distubed by doing something naughty. One of the faces seems so damn familar to me.   
I know him.   
But my heads hurts so much.   
But I know him!  
He just stares at me for some moments. Disbelief in his eyes. Tears. Joy.  
I know that face.  
I know his name.  
Just that moment my memory starts to reboot. Yunho. I remember how they seperated us. How the white clothed people took me away from him. I have buried those memories so deep inside me but now they´re all back.   
Ever since we have been parted, I have been hoping to see my brother again. I glare down his naked chest. His pants are still open. I can´t help but grin. Well, just not this much of him..  
I manage a smile towards him. "Wow you have moobs! They fed you well?" I comment and in the next moment he hugs me so tight it hurts.   
"You´re okay?" he asks. "You´re really okay?" I can feel his tears wet my cheek.   
"Well, if you don´t suffocate me by hugging I´m as fine as I can be."   
Yunho lets go of me, but his hands still hold on to mine.  
I smile at him. How much I have missed him. He´s all I have left. I cried myself into sleep each night, calling out for him.  
  
  
 **Yoochun´s PoV**  
  
I take Jaejoong´s hand and together with Junsu we leave the room, gathering in the kitchen.   
"He has plug-ins", Jaejoong says. "Right behind his ear. Looks as if you can just stick an USB-stick into them. Horrible." I can see the goosebumbs on his skin as he hands us both a bowl with cold and spiced meat. I feel a shiver run down my spine. So that mean he´s really one of the guinea-pigs of the scientists. Poor boy. Out of us I´m probably the only one who understands what it means being their guinea pig. Only that I escaped them. Plug-ins. I wonder what that means. What they did to him and how they changed him while I slowly chew on the meat. "You have any idea how long he stayed at that lab?" I ask Junsu but he shakes his head. "We, Yunho...eh... we didn´t talk that much, yet." A blush covers his cheeks and I chuckle at him being to cute again. It´s been really a long time since I saw him like that.   
Jae munches on his meat and stays silent. I know he´s still sorta mad. Maybe he´s just jealous. He and Junsu have been so close as long as I can remember. Even before I joined them. When Jaejoong rescued me Junsu encouraged us in our love. Shouldn´t Jae do the same for him now? It´s not the first time I see the dark side of my lover but this time it´s about the family and it worries me.   
"Why do you ask?" Junsu asks, getting me back from my wandering thoughts. I just shrug at him. "Nothing. Just curious." Junsu doesn´t know much about my time at a simliar laboratory. I don´t want to tell him either.   
About an hour later Yunho joins us in the kitchen. Junsu hands him some of the meat but he just shakes his head. I feel Jae stiffen next to me and again I wonder just why he dislikes him so much.   
"Changmin´s resting?" Junsu asks and takes Yunho´s hand. He pulls the slightly taller man into his arms, back against chest, and leans his head onto his shoulder.   
"Yeah, he´s sleeping." He maybe wants to tell us more but Jaejoong interrups him.   
"Great, then you can leave soon."   
Junsu´s head snaps up. "What? He won´t leave!"   
Jae throws his bowl in the sink, making me jump in suprise. I try to take his hand but he pulls it out of my reach. "We barely have enough to survive ourselves. How do you think we can feed another two hungry people?!"   
Junsu´s about to go mad. I see his eyes darken and he makes a step towards Jaejoong but Yunho stops him. He looks tired to me. Really tried.   
"I´ll take care of Changmin and myself", he says calmly. "I took care of myself for the last year and before that of me and my brother. So you won´t have to worry about feeding us. We.."   
"No." Junsu says. "We share. You can go hunting with Jae and me but we will keep it as before and share. We´re a family!"   
"Family?" Jaejoong snaps at him. "He´s a total stranger! He can´t stay! He´ll just bring tears over you!"   
I blink questioning at him and get up, taking Jaejoong´s arm to calm him down a bit. He´s going to far. Junsu´s seems calm to me - thanks to Yunho - but I can see his eyes flicker with anger.   
"Get out!" he hisses. "I don´t want to see you anymore!"   
I pull Jaejoong upstairs to our room before they can get into a serious fight - worring about them.   
  
  
**Yunho´s PoV**  
  
I sort of understand him. I know food´s rare and Changmin and me staying here does not only mean food will be less but also water, fuel for the generater so there will be light in Changmin´s room. And there´s so much more. Maybe Jaejoong thinks I´m taking Junsu away from him. I don´t know how close they are but ...I guess I have no choice but the prove him I´m not the enemy.   
Maybe it would be better if we just leave again as soon as Changmin´s strong enough. But then... I know I coulnd´t leave Junsu ever again.   
He hugs me, snuggles up to me and buries his face in my shoulder. "I´m sorry", I hear his muffled voice. "I dunno what´s gotten into him."   
I kiss his hair and gently push him away so I can look at him. I feel dizzy now that the stress of the past months is taken from me. I could need some sleep but I don´t feel tired. Just dizzy. Worn out.   
"It´s okay", I tell Junsu with a smile. "I can understand him."   
Junsu takes my face between his hands, forcing me to look at him. He smiles. His smile really is angelic. "You´re too good for this world", he tells me. I kiss his nose and feel his hands wander over my body again. Does he never get enough?  
His touch is like fire on my skin. It makes my body ache for more. I´ve never felt anything like this before. He makes me weak and feel okay about it. I had to be strong throughout my whole life. I had to protect my family first, later my brother. Later, I had to survive by myself. Alone. you can´allow yourself to be weak when you´re alone.   
But now, Junsu...I barely know him and yet I can hand myself completely over to him.   
I still feel dizzy and can barely supress a yawn. Junsu breaks the kiss and looks at me. Worried. "You should rest a bit. When did you get your last good night´s sleep?" He asks and I can´t help but give out a dry laughter. "Good? Well, I don´t know. When my parents were still alive? But if you mean when I last allowed myself some rest - I guess that was around 48 hours ago."   
Junsu gasps and takes my hand, rushing me back into his room.   
"Really Su, I´m not tried right now! I´m just.." But he doesn´t allow me to go on. He pushes me on the bed, leans over me and his tongue flickers over one of my nipples, earning a moan.   
"Well then I´ll take care you will be throughoutly tired when I´m finished with you in an hour...or two..or three."   
  
**Jaejoong´s PoV**  
  
Yoochun closes the door behind us while I growl out in frustration and kick my books against the wall, cursing out loud. My lover waits at the door and I´m grateful for that. He knows I need my time when I´m mad. But still when I look at him, I see he´s confused. I can understand him but I´m not sure if I can tell him why I´m so mad...  
After some moments he closes the distance between uns and pulls me into his strong arms. I bury my head into his shoulders, inhaling the scent of him.  
"Why do you hate Yunho so much?" he asks me gently and I squirm in this embrace. But shaking my head won´t help. He lifts my chin, brushing some of my long hair from my face. "Don´t you think he can make Junsu happy?"   
"No", I whisper hoarsly. "He´ll only make him cry."   
Yoochun´s still confused and I know I can´t escape without an answer now. "Why?"   
I can´t stand to look into his eyes but still, I meet his. I feel tears welling up, blurring my vision.  
"He´s infected." 


	4. Chapter 4

**Yoochun´s PoV**   
  
Imagine a child gone lost. He´s barely ten years old - scared and lonely without his parents and his brother. A group of men find him, promise him to help him find his family. To help him going back home. To make it all better.   
But they never do.   
They take him to their laboratories. Lock him in a room when he tries to run away.   
They inject something into his veins, making his body burn like fire, leaving the boy screaming for hours. As soon as the pain subsides they take some tests on him and when they don´t get the results they want, the men in white inject him something else.   
And again.   
And again.   
And then one day it seemd to bring the wanted results. This time, when they cut his skin the wound healed faster than usual and even the old scars started to fade. But that was not enough for them.   
They let him rest a few weeks but then injected him something that his body reacted even worst to. Four days the boy fought with death but he had a strong will and he survived. When he woke up the doctors smiled at him, telling him that he would now be save from death.  
Well, not that.  
But close to.   
At least he is save for the plague that killed half of humankind yet.   
As soon as the boy was able to get up from his bed he sneaked out of his room and looked up his personal data. What he found shocked him beyond belief. They had infected him with the seed but it seemed it didn´t grow inside him. The doctors noted it as immunity towards the seed - thanks to their experiments.   
He didn´t read the sidenotes. He knew all he had to.   
All his life the boy had been told to stay away from the seeds and their hosts for they brought death over everyone who came in contact with their blood. And now he had it black on white that he was infected himself. It scared him shitless.   
That night the boy ran away from te laboratories. He felt strong enough for the first time ever since they had gotten him there. Seedhosts survive around half a year after infection - that´s the time the seed needs to grow inside them. As soon as the flower blooms the hosts´s die along - that´s what I was told. That´s how I saw it on the streets.   
  
I was 9 when they infected me. Now I´m 20 and I´m still alive. I never had any of the symtomes that come along with the seeds. Rage...Aggression ...Panicattacks. Nothing.  
But I always carry the fear with me for I don´t know how long the seed will sleep on. Maybe forever. Maybe it wakes tomorrow. Maybe it´s already dead and I just don´t know.   
  
"So when there´s a way to make someone immune, why don´t the docs just produce a serum and hand it out for immunization?" Jaejoong asks me. Its not the first time the asks me. Ever since he´d known about my time in the labs there´s this and more questions between us. He doesn´t want to loose me and I won´t want to loose him either. He can be infected as easily as it happened to Yunho now. And I wouldn´t know a way to save him. Somehow I can understand him now. His wish to seperate Yunho and Junsu before it´s too late - as it is with us.   
I stroke Jae´s hair, playing with the long stands. "Because out of all the kids in that lab I was the only one who survived. And I guess it was the same with Changmin. This serum is more deadly than it is at saving lives yet. Even with our surviving - the seeds evolves as well. I don´t know if I could survive another infection. Maybe it changed and I´m not immune anymore."   
"But it would give them more time", Jaejoong whispers. I kiss his cheek and he snuggles up to me. "And what if it kills him? Plus there´s no serum yet. Just us, people like Changmin and me. We have no way to get a antidote."   
"So he has to die in less than half a year", Jaejoong whispers. "I won´t allow him to stay here then. I can´t. I can´t because of Junsu. I don´t want to see him suffer."   
I put a finger on his mouth to shut him up. "Think good about that Jaejoong. If I only had half a year left, would you give up right now just to spare yourself the pain or would you rather spend the time with me, creating memories you can keep in your heart? We shouldn´t be selfish."  
  
  
 **Changmin´s PoV**  
  
It´s been two months since we moved in with the guys and I have to admit it´s fun. It took me a full month to recover from my time in the laboratories but during that time Yunho and his new friends took really good care of me - at least when they were not screwing like rabbits next door. Believe me, it´s not fun to have a room between two bedrooms.   
Yoochun´s sugar. He build me a computer with stuff he found in old houses and now I´m training my new microchips and well, my abilities by myself and with Yoochun´s help. Angel´s not that happy about it but don´t care. He´s just jealous - and he´s really cute when he´s jealous.   
I have to admit I was so glad when Yoochun told me that he was at the laboratories a swell. There´s so much I can´t talk about with Yunho but Yoochun understands. Most of it happened to him as well. We both still have side effects. Besides the constant headache, I have days where I can barely get out of bed for every cell in my body seems to hurt. I feel sick and my bones seem to - I don´t know - even they seem to hurt. But it´s getting better slowly. Yoochun told me he´s having difficulties to breath sometimes and his vision blurrs from time to time. Well, I guess we can be glad to be still alive.   
Thanks to that I have to say Yoochun and I stick together quete often and was also the one who told me about my brother.   
I was so shocked.   
I`m still in some state of shock.  
Ever since they told me about it we´re working on research. Quietly. Without letting Yunho or Junsu know about it. I won´t let my brother leave me again!  
Both me and Yoochun survived a seed but we´re two out of thousands. Right now we´re mostly concentrating on finding someting so prolong his time. Our time. I can´t stand the thought of loosing him again and often I just go panic. Locking myself in my room and not allowing anyone in while I weep.  
Angel calms me down then - but the more time goes by, the more scared I am.   
Yunho doesn´t know it yet.  
Does he?  
I don´t know. I can´t ask him.   
What´s my change for a use when I can´t help my brother now?  
  
 **Junsu´s PoV**   
  
I can´t remember a time when I was this happy. Yunho and I spend all of our time together. I can spend hours just watching him sleep and when he moans my name while making love it´s the best sound that ever reached my ears.   
After our fight Jaejoong seemed to have calmed down about us and I´m glad he did. We can be a big happy family like this.  
He and Yunho respect each other now and they´re an incredible hunting team. Jae´s fears of not having enough food for us did not came true so we´re actually leading a quite good life now.  
It´s been almost 3 months now since we met Yunho and Changmin. Summer just arrived. It´s hot even though the sun is hidden by the purple sky.   
Yunho and Jaejoong just went out with the car to replenish our reserves. It´s not good to stay outside too long during this time of the year because of the heat but Yunho and Yoochun build a huge parasol on the roof just a few days ago and I plan on spending some time up there. I like te view we have from up there. But this time it seems I´m not the only one with that idea. I can´t help but give a little noise of surprise when I find Yoochun and Changmin on the roof, naked limbs tangled together on a blanked, skin shaded by the parasol.   
They´re kissing.  
I don´t know what makes me more mad. The fact that they´re up here making out - or the betrayal behind this. I step on the roof and walk over to them clearing my throat as I stand in front of them. Changmin looks up first an innocent smile on his face. "Oh, hi Junsu!"   
I almost slapped him at that moment.   
Rage runs through me. I really start to love Changmin as if he was my little brother but right now he´s stealing Yoochun from Jaejoong. And Jaejoong means a lot more to me!   
Yoochun seems to take in my mood a lot quicker than the smart kid. He gets up, and takes my outreached arm. "It´s not as you think Junsu."   
"As....so you want to tell me you´re not betraying Jaejoong?`"   
"Right", Yoochun says. As usual he stays totally calm. "Jaejoong knows about this. We share."   
Changmin smiled and licks his lips. "Actually Angel´s an even better kisser."   
"Watch your tongue kid!" Yoochun growls and I blink at them. How could I have missed that? The three stick together so often but I never thought they were this close.   
"You´re up here?" Jaejoong´s voice makes me turn and I gasp at his sight. "What happened to your eye?"   
Jae smiled faintly and covers his black and blue eye. "It´s okay, nothing serious. We just got into a little fight."   
I feel a shiver run down my back. Yunho didn´t come up with him. "Where´s Yunho?"   
Jaejoong waves his hand as he´s busy with Changmin and Yoochun trying to get a look on his face at the same time - turning him in different directions. "He was tired and went into your room. Let him rest a bit - he fought me out of that."   
I nod and relief floods me. He´s okay.   
  
"Salt...Water....Floor..." I mumble to myself, walking along the shelves in the basement of the house. Once a week I check our reserves to see if we need something. We often trade with other groups and I heard that some friends of us are not that far away right now. Confused my look stops at a little bag, hidden behind the heavy boxes with water.   
"Whose are these?" Anger swings in my voice. I gathered the others in the kitchen and throw the bag on the table. I can´t believe drugs made their way into my house. Right under my eyes.   
"Whose are these?" I call out again and this time I don´t hide how angry I am. I won´t let them go until I haven an answer.   
Then suddenly a hand reaches out, taking one of the pills that fell out of the bag. I look up and can´t believe my eyes.   
"They´re mine", Yunho says.


	5. Chapter 5

**Junsu´s PoV**  
  
Imagine a little boy. He´s lost just like to many kids during the war. But he is yet not lost like the others. He rather lost something.   
He lost his smile.   
He lost his voice.   
He lost his will to live.   
He lost it the moment the bomb hit the house of his family. He was in the basement, playing with his little toys which he had hidden there from his brother.   
When the rescue team pulled him out of the destroyed house, telling him it was a little mircale he was still alive while his family died, he didn´t believe them. He´d rather been death along with his parents and brother.   
He was 5 years old.  
They brought him to another family. Parents who took in children like him. There was already another boy, an orphan like him. But he was yet so different. Always a smile on his face and he was cheerful, risky - maybe a little crazy - in his attitude. "This is your new brother", they told the boy who lost his smile. "He´ll show you around. You should become like real brothers."   
The boys different, yet so similar stayed together ever since then.   
The war grew worse and it reached the smaller cities.   
Bombs had destroyed their home this time as well and it wasn´t over now. "Let´s leave here", Jaejoong once said, taking Junsu´s hand. Their adoptive parents had died just a day earlier. Again the boys had lost their family. "They say the war´s over in Seoul. There´s not much left there but let´s go there!"   
Junsu just stared at him. Jae tightened the grib around his hand. "We will have our own family and we´ll allow nothing to take it away again!"   
Suddenly and for the first time in the past 10 years Jaejoong saw a glimpse of hope in the eyes of Junsu and he heard the voice of his little brother, hoarse and yet so beautiful. "A family...yes."   
  
I´ve always wanted to have a family. A real one. One noone will ever take away from me. No war, no death. Nothing.   
I wanted a happily-ever-after-family.  
Why is he destroying that now? I trusted him. I love him. Why is he betraying my dream? Our dream?  
When Yunho makes his confession I can only answer with a gasped "Why?"  
He stares at me, sadness in his eyes and shakes his head. Tears well up in my eyes as I storm out of the room. Treason gnaws at my heart, making it hard for me to think, to breath.  
I leave the house. I need fresh air - I need to think.  
Why him?  
Why does he take such stuff? Can he really be this stupid? Have I really been so...wrong in trustig him?  
Drugs nowadays are so highly addictive. They have been bad in the old days but now...they´re changing a person so much. I saw other people slowly rotting away because of them.  
In a world were life is so precious, why is he destroying his? Why is he destroying our love? Our together. Our family.  
I just can´t understand it. With a loud cry I hit my first against a wall.  
  
 **Yunho´s PoV**  
  
They can´t understand.  
They must not know.  
I feel Changmin´s eyes heavy on me. Guilt rushes through me. I know he wants a reason and I´d love to give him one but I can´t. I should run after Junsu, explaining it to him but I can´t. I can´t let them know.   
I put the bag with the pills in my pocket and leave the room without looking up.   
Changmin makes a move to follow me but I hear Yoochun stopping him. I´m glad they´ve gotten this close. He´ll take good care of Min.   
I´m just worried about Junsu. Who will take care of him?  
  
I let the door fall shut behind me and fall down on the bed. There´s not much time left. I know I should be leaving before it´s too late. I´m already hurting Junsu more than Iever wanted to. But I can´t. I want to savour every tiny second I can spend with my love and with my new family. They all mean so much to me. I want them to have a good memory of me. I want to have good memories of them.   
I feel my heart ache and then suddenly anger runs through my mind. Rage and aggression. I need all my strength to stay calm and not jump up, destroying something. It´s a side effect of the seed. That´s why 95 % of the seedhosts go mad. My body hurts and I feel my stomach turning. Panting now I pull out the drugs from my pocket and swallow two of the pills. When I found them I started with a half. But then one day a half didn´t help anymore. And right now they´re the only reason I´m still sane. The only reason I´m still here.   
I lean back and close my eyes - my hands clenching into fists while I wait for the drugs to kick in, to restrain me. To overpower the rage of the seed.   
  
**Changmin´s PoV**  
  
I wish one of the pills would have fallen on the floor so I could find out more about the drug. About the ingredients. About it´s use. I can´t just believe Yunho takes them out of pure pleasure. Just for the kick of it. That´s not him. And I wouldn´t accept that.   
When Yunho leaves the room Jaejoong curses out loud and runs after Junsu. He´ll bring him back, I´m sure.   
I´m confused and Yoochun and I go up to my room. I hit my pillow hard before stitting down and hugging my legs.   
"Did you know he takes drugs?" Yoochun asks carefully.  
"Hell NO!" I shout at him but regret it the same moment. "Sorry. I´m...no I didn´t know. With a sigh I reach out for my notes, staring at the papers. With Yunho taking the drugs it all changes.  
Together with Jaejoong we started to work on a serum based on the differences in our DNA and blood. On a hunt without Yunho Yoochun and Jae had stolen as much as they could carry from an abandoned laboratory so I had something to work with.   
My brain may work better than the one of any other human thanks to the microchips and implants but sometimes the world just seems a big riddle to me. I groan in frustration and throw the papers against the wall. "It´s never going to work! Not with the drugs in his blood now. I´m no scientist. I just can´t do that!" I feel tears well up in my eyes as helplessness overcomes me.  
Yoochun gets up from his place and comes over, pulling me into his arms. "You´re doing your best Min."   
"My best isn´t enough though."   
  
**Jaejoong´s PoV**   
  
I hurry through the city, keeping my eyes open for Junsu. It doesn´t take me long to find him though. He has this one special place he goes to when everything in the world seem to work against us.   
The sun´s setting somewhere behind the purple sky turning the clouds into a deep violet. Junsu´s sitting on a swing, slowly rocking back and forth. His knuckles are bloody but I overlook it. I´ll take care of that later.   
Without a word I sit down on the swing next to him. I would not know what to say anyway. _He´s sick, you know? He´ll die soon. He takes the drugs not to you hurt you._ and yet he hurt Junsu even more by taking them.   
I know the reason he takes them but I had to promise him not to tell anyone.   
I won´t.  
It´s his job to tell Junsu that he´s sick. As much as I want to spare him the pain - as much as I love Junsu. His promise - I will keep it.   
On the other hand I didn´t tell Yunho that I knew he was a seedhost even before he told me. That Yoochun and Changmin know...  
He wouldn´t have told me his secret but he had no choice. The effect of the drugs had worn off during our hunt and we got into a fight. He couldn´t control himself when he hit me, so I don´t blame him - but I saw him taking the drugs with shaking hands and calming down afterwards. I couldn´t help but question him.  
  
Junsu pulls me out of my thoughts by getting up and walking behind me, laying his arms around me. "Why?" he asks but he does not give me the time to answer. His chin rests on my head. "I won´t allow him to destroy the family we have", he mumbles and the dark swing in his voice sends creeps up my spine.   
"I won´t allow him to destroy my family."


	6. Chapter 6

**Junsu´s PoV**   
  
"Don´t touch him! He´s mine!" My voice let the people stop in their movements. I can almost feel their fear as they see us coming closer. Me and my people. They don´t dare to touch the body and just flee.   
I stare down at the motionless figure in the dirt. He barely breaths. Emotions dwell up inside me but I force them down. _Why have you done this? Again. Why did you run from me? Again._ Changmin checks him on livesigns and nods to me. "It´s not as bad as I thought. He´ll survive."   
I don´t know if these words really relieve me. Maybe it would have been better for both us if he had just died here. And yet.... I know I wouldn´t have survived it either.   
"Let´s get him back home." I give my orders to the others, turning around and walking back to my shag without once looking back.   
  
He´s still half unconsious when I check on him a few hours later. The dark hair around his face is sweaty, he had difficulties to breath. Changmin told me he did what he needed to, now it was up to him. If we had not found him at that time the drugs would surely have killed him. Maybe that´s just what he wanted. Maybe that´s why he ran away.   
But he´s mine. I won´t allow him to die. Nor will I allow him to flee from me another time.   
  
Slowly he opens his eyes and for a second I allow myself to drown in them. In his face. The darkness of his eyes. The scars around his left eye. The tiny mole just above his lustfull lips.   
But by the time when his vision becomes more clear, when he realized he´s back home I´m my usual self again. Cold. Selfconfident. The Boss of this little groub of survivors.   
"Yunho", I say his name but clear my voice of all emotions I have for him. I don´t want him to know just how much I worry for him. How much I love him. It wouldn´t be good. It could too easily destroy us.   
He groans as he hears my voice. Is he mad that it didn´t work? That the drugs didn´t kill him? Again. That I catched him and brought him back - again.   
I won´t find out. Instead I get up from my place and lean over him, kissing him almost gently. "You´re back home, Yunho."   
He´ll feel sick for a while. Maybe even longer while the drugs wear off his body. I know he wouldn´t hold out long. Somehow I can understand him. He seeks oblivion in them. He´s addicted to them just as I´m addicted to him. To his body.   
My kiss becomes more fierce and as I lift the blanked that covers his body he closes his eyes in surrender.   
There had been a time he loved it. A time he had loved me.   
And sometimes, when he´s half off the drugs, when he´s in a state like this I can get through to that old self of him. Then he screams my name when he comes.   
"Junsu ah!"   
  
Why does it have to be this complicated? Why can´t we be more like Jaejoong and Yoochun?  
A sigh leaves my lips as I feel the bed shift. As I hear him move, leave the bed for search for the only thing that can satisfy his addiction.   
Just as I ust searched for that satisfaction in him.  
  
 **Changmin´s PoV**  
  
I can´t believe how much everything changed in the last two weeks. Junsu seems to have changed completely. It seems he locked up all his emotions inside him. Ever since he had found those drugs things have gotten worse. Everything. I´m constantly into fights with Jaejoong and Yoochun because I can´t believe into my work anymore. I´m still doing it..working on a serum. But I don´t see the point in it anymore.   
Yoochun has catched a cold and ever since then his lungs are becoming worst. Junsu´s so coldhearted...he gets into fights over nothing with other gang and comes home bloody. But what´s most important h eseems to have also locked up his feelings for Yunho. My beloved brother. His condition...I´m scared each morning to wake up because I don´t know if he´ll survive the day. He´s fighting. I can see it. But why fighting something that´s so...   
He´s taking more drugs and he´s so spaced out most of the time that it scares me. Sometimes he doesn´t even recognize us. And then again he´s fine for hours. Jaejoong told me Yunho´s taking them to surpress the rage of the seed but I guess he tied to take an overdose on purpose. He wants to end it. He tried it three times yet. He ran away from home and we found him just in time to save him. I can´t say why we still search for him. Sometimes I think it may be better if we didn´t...but how can I leave my brother out there? My brother who searched for me so long. My brother who risked his live to safe me. And Junsu, he still loves him, no matter how deep down he buried his emotions, I´m sure he does. So we can´t leave him outside to die.  
  
I cry so much lately and often I work all night on something just to throw it against the wall when dawn arrives. I can´t believe in what I´m doing. There´s no chance I can make it in time. It feels so close, my goal and yet it´s so far away. There´s no chance I can do it at all.  
Junsu still thinks that it´s just the drugs that changed Yunho. None of us have had the heart to tell him yet.   
Sometimes we talk for hours when Yunho´s asleep. Junsu and I. He tells me about himself and wants me to tell him more about Yunho. I think he tries to find a way to understand why he started taking drugs. I can´t just tell him that we´ll be alone soon - and yet there´s something between us...a bond that drags us together each time Yunho´s peacefully asleep. When we talk Junsu´s more like his old self and he often cries. Then I can´t do more than offer him my embrace. I can´t soothe him. I´m too broken inside as well.  
  
 **Yunho´s PoV**  
  
It hurts.   
My mind feels shattered.   
Each time I´m high on the drugs I just see everything through a deep fog. My emotions are blank and my memories plays tricks with me.   
Junsu, my beloved Junsu. I hurt him with every pill I take. But without them...I might be already dead.   
He´s so cold lately. But it´s better for him. Getting some shell. He won´t be hurt so much as soon as I´m gone.   
I tries to run away, tried to stop it but they found me. They find me each time. Bring me back. I wish they wouldn´t.  
  
 **Yoochun´s PoV**  
  
It´s time to talk. This can´t go on like this. We´re breaking apart. Everything has gone from great to really really bad. Even Jaejoong and I started to fight on a regular base. Over nothing. Nonsense. It´s time to stop this!   
I gather them in the living room. It´s one of Yunho´s rarely sane moments and I´m glad about it.   
"It´s time we talk!" I start, glaring at Yunho. "No more secrets in this house. Yunho, I think there´s something you have to tell Junsu."   
Junsu blinks and speaks up before Yunho can start. "No! Me first!" He gets up, taking position in front of Yunho, staring into his eyes. "Why did you do this, Yunho? I asked you this so often now but I never got an answer. I demand one now! Why did you start with the drugs? Why did you flee from me and my love? Am I not enough? Don´t you love me? Don´t you..."   
"I´m dying." Yunho interrupts him.   
I feel Changmin stiffen next to me. Speaking it out - hearing it from his brothers mouth made it real now. Min´s shivering and Jae places and arm around him.   
Junsu´s staring at Yunho. Confused. Hurt. Shocked.   
"What?" he asks simply.  
And then Yunho starts to talk. He tells Junsu the truth he should already have told him half a year ago. He doesn´t leave a detail out. Not even his suicide attempts. When he´s finished Junsu turns to us. "Did you know about that?" He´s pale and I can understand how betrayed he must feel now. We just wanted to save him the pain - but actually we just made it worse.   
Junsu doesn´t wait for an answer. He sees it in our eyes. He turns back to Yunho slapping him hard. "WHY DIDN`T YOU TELL ME YOU MORON? Why..." the next words die in his sobs. Yunho hugs him, strocking his hair.   
"And...there´s nothing..we can do?" Junsu chockes between his sobs. He clings to Yunho so hard it must hurt the other one. But he doesn´t complain. Instead he just shakes his head and I feel tears dweel up in my eyes. Jaejoong comes over to me and snuggles against my back. It could have been us so easily.   
"There is this", Changmin suddely speaks up. We all freeze and turn to him. Right at that moment I realize just how must he must suffer from all this himself. Dark shadows under his eyes tell me from all the sleepless nights and he´s gotten so incredibly thin lately. Why haven´t I seen that earlier?   
Tears are glistening in Changmin´s eyes but his face is grim. He places an injection on the table. "It might kill you right now. It might save you", he says and I see his hands are shivering. He´s close to collapse. And he´s scared. "It´s all I could do in this time", he whispers barely audible and I´m not even sure someone besides me hears it.   
Yunho leaves Junsu on the couch and walks over to his little brother.   
Gently he strokes his hair and lets his hand rest on Changmin´s cheek. "My little Mastermind", he says and leans down to kiss his forehead. "I trust you", he whispers and takes the syringe. He walks over to Junsu again and kisses him. Deep. Sensual.  
Then he rams the needle into his arm.   
  
Five seconds later he sinks to the floor.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
_and now my dear readers it´s up to you how you want to end this story. I have two different endings for you._  
  
  
  
~  
  
  
"The good one"  
  
  
 **Junsu´s PoV**   
"Good morning, Baby." I smile and lean down over the sleeping form on the bed. Gently I kiss his lips. He does not twitch. No reaction, just like the last months.   
He seems dead but he isn´t.   
He´s recovering.   
It´s a state close to a coma but I don´t mind. He´s alive and his body is slowly but surely recovering from the seed. One day he´ll wake up. I´m sure. It´s the only thing that keeps me going on.   
It´s been a year since he injected Changmin´s serum into his blood. The first two weeks were horrible.He was in so much pain, his fever was so high and not just once I was sure I would loose him - but then one morning he was sleeping very deep and calm. And it´s like this ever since.  
We moved to the countryside when the city became to dangerous. Another groub has joined us and Changmin´s starting to bloom in his friendship with one of them.   
My hand runs over Yunho´s arm and absentmindly my gaze wanders to the window sill. Despite the purple sky a little flower had started to grow there. A sunflower. Isn´t it paradox?  
Suddenly I feel something move under my hand, taking it and squeezing it slightly. Tears run down my cheeks as I turn to the bed. Yunho smiles at me. "Good morning Sunshine."   
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
"the sad one"  
  
 **Jaejoong´s PoV**  
  
"Hi there", a faint smile shows on my face. I squat down, wince as pain shots through my knee. "I´m sorry, it´s been a while since we visited you, but we´re constantly on the run. You know, the seedhostlings took over most of the city. It´s nowhere safe anymore." I run my hand over the small stones. Tombstones.   
It´s been a month since we last were in Seoul to visit the graves of Yunho and Junsu. During their last kiss they shared more than just a farewell. They shared a last secret. A last promise to each other. Just one week after Yunho´s death Junsu followed him. He could not live without him.   
So much changed since then.   
Changmin, he´s blaming himself for not having success with his serum. For letting Yunho try it. He stopped speaking shortly after Yunho´s death. Not did he touch anything science related anymore. He even moved away from us, emotionally.   
Yoochun´s health is more or less steady now. I hurt my knee on one of our escapes from the seedhosts.   
  
But at least we´re alive - though sometimes I wonder what it´s worth.


End file.
